How to start and run your Fathers Matter Connect Group

To start a Fathers Matter Connect Group, we recommend working through the following list:

  1. Find the right champion. This should be someone who has the vision and time to get things going. You (the person reading this) might well be that champion. If not, think of people in your church or community who might be suitable.
  2. Decide who you would like to invite to your Connect Group. Think of people you know who would benefit from being part of this group. Try to bring people together from different age groups and backgrounds.
  3. Aim to include five to eight people. Having more than this makes it difficult to share and connect deeply.
  4. Invite people to participate. This can be done by email, WhatsApp, or phone, but speaking face-to-face is often best.
  5. Ask them to commit to attending. Initially invite people to join for the first module. They can then decide whether they want to continue after that.
  6. Set a date and time for the first meeting. Let everyone know that each session will be between one and one-and-a-half hours long.
  7. NB: While COVID-19 is affecting social gatherings, your group might decide to meet online using Zoom, WhatsApp or Google Meet (or have some members meeting remotely and others meeting in person).

What you need to run your Connect Group

Here is a list of things you’ll need for each session:

  • A digital or hardcopy version of the outline for the session for each group member.
  • A laptop or USB-compatible screen if you’re meeting in person.
  • A copy of the videos for that session downloaded onto a computer or USB flash drive. Or a download/link of the video material for that week to share with your group online or on WhatsApp.
  • A notebook and Bible – for Christian groups.

If you don’t have a way to show the videos, you can leave that section out. But we strongly recommend that you do show them, even if it’s on someone’s tablet.

How to prepare for each session

How you prepare for every session, how you make people feel comfortable, and how honest you are when you share will set the tone for your Connect Group.

  • Before each session, read through the material.

  • Spend some time reflecting on your own relationship with your father. This course may bring up some strong emotions or unresolved matters regarding your own father story. If necessary, discuss this with someone you trust beforehand, to better equip you as you facilitate this course. You may also want to read some additional material, which we recommend on our site.

  • If you have time, watch the video clips before each session.

  • Remind all members about details for the upcoming session, and any pre-work needed.

  • Maintain a positive, respectful attitude!

If you’re running a Christian connect group:

  • Spend some time in prayer for the group.

  • Encourage people to bring their Bibles.

  • Expect God to work in people’s lives during and after the discussions.

How do I facilitate a Connect Group?

Well done for putting up your hand to facilitate a Connect Group! It’s not an easy thing to do, but it’s very rewarding.

As the facilitator, you set the tone for how safe and empowered people feel to share their stories.

Your role as a facilitator or small group leader is to:

  • Welcome all members equally.

  • Create a safe space for exchanging ideas, opinions and stories.

  • Help the group take a journey of discovery together.

  • Model respect, trust, understanding, empathy and safety.

  • Prepare well, including praying for your group if applicable.

  • Stick to the timing guidelines as much as possible to ensure that group members get the most out of each session.

  • Create an environment where people feel free to express their thoughts. Watch for body language and encourage those who are quiet to share their opinions.

  • Gently remind everyone to not be “that person” in the group: the one who talks so much they don’t give anyone else a chance to! As the facilitator, don’t be “that person” either.

  • Allow people to share examples from their lives that could enhance the learning experience.

  • Once you’ve run a Fathers Matter Connect Group, we’d love to hear your feedback on how it went! Please feel free to share testimonies, photos or videos with us on any of these channels:

Connect Group Facilitator's Toolkit

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